Lost at Sea - Really?

Since I’ve taken on the role of “Puppy Mom” again, I don’t have long stretches of time to do much of anything. My already strained focus abilities are beyond stressed . Add to that a little sleep deprivation and the result is that I’ve been walking in a zombielike state many days and my goals are being tossed aside. I tell myself that my full time job is keeping Percy from killing himself. No worries though, it’s all temporary, I hope. I pray. Maybe I’m being a little overly dramatic here. hmmm…maybe.

I say all of that to say that for now, I paint in very short stints and when I can. It’s much easier to paint abstracts these days. I can’t imagine trying to paint some of the super realism pieces that I painted just before getting Percy. The experts tell me to niche down and paint in one style. Other experts tell me to be authentic to who I am. Very confusing, so in the end, I must listen to myself. The truth is that I like to paint both realism and abstract pieces. Maybe that will change later, but for now you may see my very eclectic art, but just know that it is all totally me. I like to look at my abstract pieces as, “Soul Art”. It really does come from my soul, and is therapeutic for me.

As I often do, I painted an ocean scene the other day. It started out with a gray ocean and dark but vibrant sky. I kept working through the creative process until it turned into a more volatile scene with the ocean being pounded with rain.

I kept going.

The next day I decided to go darker. A mysterious and confused, although not as volatile version.

The day after that, I decided I wanted more color. More bright.

This felt better. I liked the colors of the water and that the little boat stood out. I also changed the composition to make it more aesthetically pleasing. But I just couldn’t leave it alone.

Here is the latest version. Will it stay this way? I don’t know. But isn’t this the way life is? Constantly changing. Some days we have calm seas, other days we are tossed until we feel we will be thrown overboard. Some days are gray while others have more color. Life is funny that way and we never know what the weather will be. The one constant is that we are always at its whim. Always trying to steady ourselves against the wind and waves.

I’m reminded how Jesus came here to show us that we don’t need to fear. That there is something greater in this whole scheme of life. We may not understand it, but it’s there, leading and guiding us if we will watch and listen. It is not loud, but then again it is. It’s loud enough to speak to us over the tumultuous waves. But we must tune into it.

Jesus knew very well how to do this. He tried over and over to tell us how. But we can all be a little hardheaded and would rather plunge head on into the rocky seas than to go inward and listen to that still small voice that is trying to say, “Peace be with you. I am always here, no matter the circumstances.”

My prayer for us all is that we will learn to listen and to trust that Voice.

Sending my best,

Connie